I encourage people to stop putting pressure on sex and dirty talk and just giggle.” You can switch between intensities and work up to that more explicit phrasing, or you can keep things more general; whatever fits your idea of sexy and feels right coming out of your mouth counts. “Dirty talk is categorized as [any] communication during sex that enhances sexual pleasure,” adds Dr. Tara. Then, start by whispering softly in your partner’s ear.
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Or you’re worried you’ll end up tongue-tied and won’t know what to say. Or perhaps the entire concept of it is just really embarrassing to you. For many people, the thought of talking dirty during sex can be especially daunting. Gabrielle Kassel (she/her) is a queer sex educator and wellness journalist who is committed to helping people feel the best they can in their bodies. In addition to Healthline, her work has appeared in publications such as Shape, Cosmopolitan, Well+Good, Health, Self, Women’s Health, Greatist, and more!
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You don’t want to freak him out, or make him think you’re having an affair because your sexual behavior suddenly changes so drastically. Don’t go all the way to the extreme with your dirty phrases. Say something like, “you are so sexy to me,” and go from there. If you feel uncomfortable using explicit language while talking dirty to your man or if you don’t like the idea of sending him dirty text messages, don’t feel that you have to! Talking dirty can feel foreign and awkward at first, but with practice, it can add some serious heat into your relationship and spice up your sex life. Give it a shot with your partner, and don’t forget to start off slow.
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In her free time, Gabrielle can be found coaching CrossFit, reviewing pleasure products, hiking with her border collie, or recording episodes of the podcast she co-hosts called Bad In Bed. Discuss what the dirty talk will entail to make sure it’s within everyone’s established boundaries and desires, explains Harris. You don’t have to be an erotica novelist or fanfic author to crush the dirty talk game.
- Therefore, Rullo recommends that individuals first explore their and their partner’s core needs on the topic ahead of time to ensure everyone is on the same page.
- Your partner doesn’t want to hear you reading from a sexy script — they want to hear what you’re loving and why.
- While this fantasy was of perfectly-legal drinking age, it was still a head-scratcher.
- Plus, as both Manta and Dr. Jansen mentioned, you can always find your way into sex forums and dating apps.
- That doesn’t mean you have to go full-on David Attenborough–style nature documentary (that said, if roleplay is your thing …).
- The whispers, moans, and screams accompanied by dirty talk are all processed by the brain’s hearing center, including the temporal lobe, the frontal lobe, and the occipital lobe.
The best seductive language is the kind that comes naturally to you. But it can sometimes be tough to think straight when your mind is occupied by, um, other things — so feel free to slip a few of these freaky things to say into your back pocket. Learning how to talk dirty should be fun, so try to relax and go with the flow.
